Wednesday, October 31, 2007


Him: So let me get this straight... You want me to hold your legs while you lean into the other side?

Me: Yeah, just for a half hour. If you don't, well, you didn't give me prehensile toes.

Him: Okay, go for it.

Me: (to wife) That dress makes you look fabulous.

Wife: You're just saying that because you married me.

Me: (to Him) Brace yourself. (to wife) No, really. I love you fat or thin.

Wife: So I am fat.

Him: Enjoy the swim, I'll see you later.

At that point I was in the water but at least my wife was swimming with me. On the other hand she was glaring and blocking the rocks leading up to safe detachment.

Much later...

Me: Yeah, that was fun.

Him: This does have limits. And you like to pull yourself towards them more than away from them no matter how much you try to deny it. Face it, you'd rather be with the same people maddening you more than away from them.

Me: So I'm a masochist.

Him: You are married.

Me: That's my joke.

Him: I wrote all the jokes.

Me: Yeah, yeah... Is it a good thing to pray selflessly for someone else's happiness?

Him: Way ahead of you. You just want her to be happy with her self-image so she won't ask questions that have no real winning answer for you so it isn't selfless.

Me: Damn.

Him: Watch it.

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